Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My Fear is Very Real



Anyone want a Fushigi Ball as badly as I do?

Yeah, life is awesome; my brother makes posts about Mars' moon (Pig Disgusting, check him out) and I'm just sitting here, alone at my apartment,taking shots of Jeremiah Weed Vodka and watching The Sweet Life of Zack and Cody.

Holy hell. How have I never watched this before? There's a kid with glasses and braces and I'm in love. What I can't understand is why there is a Hannah Montana look-alike. At first I thought it was her show with a replacement (keep in mind, I was 8 shots into my descent).

Ok. Oh god. I'm for realz in love. This kid with the braces. He plays a fake version
of the Sims called, "Better Life" and there's a talking cat named, "Cody." Oh my god. I'm flipping in love with the cat now.

The way it prances and hops on the arcade seamlessly...like legs weren't even meant for jumping. They were made for floating.

No. Kid with the glasses. His Better Life character has these unnaturally huge, almond shaped eyes and walks like his crotch weighs 16 pounds. I dig it.

I'm drunk, but I dig it.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Peopleonthestreets

Is it me or has this season's Real World: New Orleans been a little...off?

For one thing, nothing seemed shocking. The closest I came to being shocked, actually, was when the season previews showed Ryan frying one of the tropical communal fish, which--as it turns out--died a natural death anyway. In other words, Ryan was only r e c y c l i n g (<3'd that kid).

If anything, I was more shocked that Ryan's "oddities" made him some last-minute antagonisto...like Mtv realized that the season had been flowing along rather swimmingly (aka NOTHING INTERESTING WAS HAPPENING) so they had the editors cleverly manipulate footage of him as if an inner psycho maniac of his was going to come to a head on the second-to-last episode and force him to leave (a little too late, Mtv, given that the show ended rather abruptly after that). Not that he probably didn't enjoy it, but still; it just didn't sit well in my stomach. Maybe because Knight's "realness" began to borderline a d!ckhead "I don't want to be seen showing respect to the girl I'm having sex with on TV" mentality; Preston's pseudo-humble attitude started to display as really pretentious; and Ashlee simply came off as just that from day 1.


Simply put, as far as the other cast mates were concerned, Ryan was the only one who gave substance to the whole Real World mythology. For starters, we all know that camera crews are just around the corner...yet Mtv still felt the need to come out one step ahead of us by acknowledging our acknowledgement of this fact, breaking the fourth wall and nonchalantly filming Ryan's one-episode return to have his pictures taken with the other cast mates for mtv.com during an episode.


Wow, NOW I know how it's all done. Eh, at least it beats the desperate attempt to demonstrate the irony of our times (and reality TV) that was the finale of The Hills...I'm still laughing about that one.

But seriously. Ryan at least attempted to play up the experience for what it usually always is (6 parts theatrics, 2 parts real, 2 parts debatable). It's not his fault that the roommates have been conditioned to appreciate the illusion of reality instead of actually being real (I believe he said it best with, "Deep down, they know they're douchebags"). Since the first day, Ryan was made the black sheep (apparently cold-ear obsessions are "weird"...) and it was only a matter of time that the roommates would have to submit to their roles of normalcy (excuse me while I throw up) by acknowledging said weirdness. Way to represent the majority of our generation! Tools.

If they had any sense (and any regard--or disregard--for the third party watching/filming them), they would have stepped-up to his level. Instead, in my opinion, most of them came off as self-righteous and, ultimately, self-conscious. I'm afraid next season will be even more painful to watch.



How could you hate on this?

Saturday, September 18, 2010

So it beginz...

It's a miracle for me to have finally taken the time to set this lil bloggy* up. This is why:

*sidenote: WHAT a great rapper name

Obviously Blogger writes "CREATE A BLOG" (all caps/orange background) to make it stand out. Took me two weeks to realize this after I kept "signing in" and discovering I was already a part of a blog from an old class and that being a part of said blog did not mean I was doomed to never having my own since, you know, there were never any instructions upon signing in that said "Start Blog." Whatttt?

Anyway, these nearly sealed the deal as far as my non-blogger status was concerned:


Flipping took 45 minutes to decipher these "words." Others included: "&^*DHJLKJ" and "girugamesh".




Could have been the K2.